Our world is very secular. There’s no way around it–culture has taken a turn away from the good and the beautiful and is moving ever closer to evil. Most of you have probably encountered this in some way–whether it be at school, on social media, or just in your day-to-day life. Perhaps you have friends and family who don’t believe in God, or who just don’t care about religion. If that’s the case, then maybe you’ve also encountered the frustration of wanting to share your faith with these people. You want to give them the Good News and bring them into God’s love, to make their lives better and help them make better decisions. But for whatever reason–circumstances, their perspective, your own family–you haven’t or aren’t able to. You feel stuck and you aren’t sure what else you can do, short of smack them in the face with Jesus. And while that may sound like an awesome idea–trust me, you’re not the only one who wishes you could just make everyone listen–it’s not going to bring them closer to Christ. It may only serve to drive them away. So how can you bring these people to the love of Christ? Well, I have two suggestions for you, and they’re both relatively simple ideas: ‘show, don’t tell’, and keep on praying. 

Show, Don’t Tell

Experienced writers have probably heard this rule before, and if you’re a reader, you may have been the one on the other side of the page when an author chose not to follow it. Showing something instead of telling in your writing is exactly what it sounds like: you show your readers the character’s emotions or reactions instead of telling them. You draw the reader in instead of forcing them to watch from the outside. For example, take this sentence: Maya glared. She felt so angry. Her mom just didn’t understand that she had to go to the movie if she wanted Laura to keep being her friend! That’s more of a ‘telling; sentence. Now, here’s a ‘showing’ sentence. Maya clenched her fists, nails digging into her skin. Laura hadn’t been talking to her for weeks, and when she finally reached out, Maya had to say no because of her mom’s stupid work dinner? How was that any fair?

Do you have a preference between the two? Hopefully if you did, it was the second one. Telling people what you want them to know usually won’t invoke the same emotions as showing them, and the same works for real life. Nobody likes to be preached at, but they might respond differently if you’re constantly living the Word of God instead of telling them about it. Kind of like how writing a monologue about why killing is bad won’t be as effective as showing why killing is bad by having a character experience the negative consequences of murder. The same is true of preaching the faith. Your family or friends probably aren’t going to want to listen to you talk on and on about how they’re going to hell and need salvation. But they will see your love. Your joy. Your personality and how you’re different from the world around you. Get them to desire Jesus by showing Jesus to them, no matter what happens. 

Mother Natalia, in an interview on Pints with Aquinas, said that she went to a FOCUS conference before converting back to Catholicism. She’d gone to the conference and seen something she’d noticed before in Christians passionate about their faith–the joy. She was “doing all of the things that the world tells us will make us happy” but she felt awful. And she began to want that joy for herself. 

Now, this isn’t to say that we can’t introduce Jesus into conversation, but I’d suggest doing this in small ways: letting your friend know you’ll pray for them when they’re going through something, or thanking Jesus aloud for something wonderful that happened, instead of focusing on the preaching aspect. Try to focus more on showing them what a life with Jesus can be like until they’re ready for the preaching aspect. Show them that it’s worth it and incredible, and let God handle the rest. 

Keep On Praying

Maybe this one is a bit more obvious, or maybe you’ve never tried it before. Or, if you have tried it, maybe you think it’s pointless. “I’ve prayed for years!” you might say, “And nothing’s changed!” 

First off: That’s not necessarily true. Nothing has changed that you can see, but none of us know what God has been doing under the surface. Small experiences, simple thoughts, emotions that nag us because of our choices can slowly pile up until we suddenly realize that we want to make a change. The conversion might not happen overnight. It could, of course, but sometimes God allows it to be gradual. He knows what this person needs and the best ways to get them to respond, and short of being a positive example, all that we can do is keep the faith and continue to pray. 

Secondly: Sometimes conversion does take years. It’s the same as in life–things won’t always happen on our timetable, and we’ve just got to trust that God will handle it. St. Monica (a devout Catholic but married to a pagan husband) prayed for her son Augustine’s conversion for seventeen years. She kept praying for him through it all, and eventually he converted to Catholicism and became a saint. When it feels like you’ve been praying for years with little to no comfort, remember the words of a certain bishop to St. Monica: “Go away,” (the bishop) said, “while you live, the son of these tears of yours shall not perish!” (The Confessions of St. Augustine). 

Don’t Give Up

In the end, there’s only so much we can do to bring God’s love to others. And sometimes those people just won’t accept Him, no matter what He does or what we do. God loves us so much that He gave us free will–and if that will results in our choosing something other than Him, He’s going to allow that in the end. That’s not what He wants–that’s not what any of us want–but it may happen sometimes. So we have to keep praying. We have to have faith and trust that God is going to do everything He can to draw His children back to Him, and we have to keep being a positive influence. That’s what it boils down to: being a beautiful witness and continually bringing our loved ones before the Father. 

Ultimately, they get to decide, but we keep trying until the end to get them to our Savior.